Showing posts with label Section 09: My Way. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Section 09: My Way. Show all posts

Section 9-1: Victimized

Note to the Professor
Due to time constraints and the fact that we are now within the last two weeks of regular curriculum, the following two sections appear electronically only, there will be no corresponding section in the written Journal. Nonetheless, I hope you enjoy the following sections!


This article lacks the usual pictures not because it is an aside, rather, I feel the topic is serious enough that the written word deserves your full attention here.

Defensive attribution, the tendency to blame victims for their misfortune, so that one feels less likely to be victimized in a similar manner.

Take a moment to read, reflect and think very carefully about that previous statement. What example comes to your mind immediately? If it was something other than rape please let me know in the comments below, but sadly this has become the sentiment surrounding the crime. How many times have you heard "She had it coming because she was dressed that way" "He shouldn't have dropped the soap (or been in prison in the first place)" Why is it that with the crime of rape it seems as though society places the blame all too often into the hands of the victimized. The logical fallacy that is defensive attribution falls apart so fast that I am surprised at its frequent use in todays modern and fairly well educated society. Almost no one would dare say a child that was the victim of crimes of pedophilia is at fault for "looking too young". So why does the blame shift when it comes to the pre-teen and adult crowds? Even statements such as "well the way she was dressed was too provocative, so she was asking for it." ...What then of European topless beaches? or African tribal culture? In these environments women walk around in their bare skin or with small fabric garments barely covering genetailia. Yet we don't perceive these women as "asking for it" or sexually provocative in the least. How does the difference in opinion from one group to the next occur?

I suggest that it's due to factors behind conformity and obedience thinking. The thought that "she was asking for it" has, unfortunately, become somewhat of a popular opinion. Many people then, are prone to jump to the same conclusions without thought because the only support they need for this hypothesis is that "it is the opinion of x,y, and z. therefore it must be true" rather than having to put their own thoughts and rationale behind this decision. Obedience also comes into play here. Not in a sense of legalities, but in a 'mob mentality' sense. Consider the gang rapes that occur all too often in middle eastern societies, In these scenarios, the assailants may be triggered by one initial actor but quickly the individuality in the mob is lost and everyone conforms to the action being performed. An individual's thoughts may be contrary to the ongoing event but due to what has become the 'social norm' of the mob,  they will follow in suit, for acting contrary may have several undesirable consequences for the individual that chooses to do so. I am in no way defending the actions of the assailants, rather trying to form my own conclusions about what causes them to act in the way that they do in these situations.


Section 9-2: Lessons in Love

-Courtesy of 49firstdates.com-
If my experience with romantic love have taught me anything it's that all women are evil there is not a particular defining trait in an individual that will cause me to find them as a suitable life partner. While I have viewed all of my previous partners as physically attractive, I am prone to the subjectivity of experience in this matter. When I view an individual as attractive in one area (say, style of humor) my overall view of them becomes more attractive, and I know this, but I also know that thus I cannot make an objective opinion on the attractiveness of my mate. If you apply this to the 'matching hypothesis' I guess I consider myself to be the most attractive individual around as I tend to view my current partner (whomever she may be) as the most attractive individual around.

One section of Interpersonal attraction in which I disagree is the fact that Married and dating couples tend to be similar on many traits. I believe there must be certain levels of connection where viewpoints are the same but that if there are no areas where conflict arises an individual will become bored of the relationship after a period of time.

Consider if you will my two longest term relationships thus far (both 2+ years of length) and the differences between the two of them. My first long term relationship was with a petite and highly athletic brunette 3 years younger than myself, we had similar senses of humor, enjoyed the same types of movies, but compared to her I was an incredibly low energy individual and her need for continual physical (athletic) stimulation would clash with my needs for intellectual stimulation quite frequently. In my second significant relationship I was paired with a curvy blonde who was 5 years older than myself, her energy level was more on par with mine and she enjoyed gaming and some of the other same social activities I did, but our senses of humor could not have been farther apart, I cannot recall once one another laughing at each others jokes, and I found her favorite programming choices on television to be offensive and crude. So while there were factors on which I associated with each of them, I found I was equally attracted to the similarities as I was to some of the differences and the differences between each of these Individuals shows no preference for age, lifestyle, race, religion, or otherwise.